Oversensitivity

Recently, I made a student cry in writing class. No, not on purpose.

We were breaking her story and the rest of class, intrigued with her premise, began to pour out questions to this overwhelmed student whose only response was “I don’t know. You’re asking the wrong person.” It happened so quickly, it didn’t occur to me to stop the barrage. Seeing that we were getting nowhere, I called a break and in the bathroom discovered how attacked this student felt. My perception of the event was completely different from hers. I saw excited students ready, willing and able to help, but needing some guidelines. She saw students laughing at her, bullying her and mocking her. She dabbed at her eyes to keep herself from an eruption of tears.

This got me thinking…

How many times have I been brought to tears because of a perceived insult? How many times have I misinterpreted well-intended comments? A LOT!!

I think my upbringing was riddled with mistaken interpretations. And I’ve been consciously undoing them ever since.

Here’s what happens…

We have pain in life. We want to stop the pain. We assign a cause to the pain so we can distance ourselves from the cause. We create more pain by blaming the cause and by creating a limiting belief around what caused the pain. This quadruples the pain because now we have a mistaken belief system that perpetuates the problem.

An example… I have pain as a child. It’s natural. Part of life. Add to that… my Dad isn’t home. I conclude I have pain because my Dad isn’t home. Now here come the limiting beliefs…my Dad abandoned me and he abandoned me because I wasn’t worthy of love.

Then we often go further than that. If Dad abandoned me, chances are that all men will abandon me. Now, I have this limiting belief that I apply to all men that wasn’t even true in the first place and the men in my life will need to abandon me in order to fulfill my belief system.

(Luckily, I cleared this belief system. Thanks USM. Thanks David Elliott.)

The origin of the original pain is negative energy that I believe is a consequence of creating a world of matter. Separation from spirit. In psychology terms, we see this as separation from the mother. In the womb and once we are born we naturally pick up negative energy from our environment. Once we have that negative energy, we draw negative response to it. It is a cycle.

The “I am unworthy of love” belief system creates more dark energy as I continue to believe it and fulfill it. Adding fuel to the fire! And soon my system (body, mind, spirit) is overwhelmed with negative energy and becomes very, very sensitive to whether a man who floats my boat feels the same way or calls on a certain day or holds the door open. I actually broke up with a guy I was living with because he got another woman pie at the Fourth of July party. (It was a large piece of pie, if you know what I mean.)

This is where oversensitivity comes from: a system that is in need of cleaning.

It could be on a physical level - not eating the right foods.
On a mental level - entertaining toxic thoughts.
On an emotional level - pain overload.
On a spiritual level -feeling abandoned by God.

This will cause us to take people’s actions or inactions personally. If someone doesn’t acknowledge us when we smile at them, suddenly we have a thought: that person is selfish or narcissistic. Actually, we have no idea what that person is. The truth is we need to cleanse our own system of such perceptions.

Then we can feel our true value. Once we are aligned with our true value, people can do whatever they want to us, say what they want, even leave us and we can greet it with acceptance and joy. We can know what they do is about them, not about us. We can see through their actions to their pain and illusion.

We can trust our inner gold as solid, unshakable, immovable and divine. We can let perceived insults flow off of us like rain off an umbrella. They don’t touch us.

But we can only do this if we have cleared our pain and our limiting beliefs.

Otherwise, people are drawn to our negative (victim) energy and we cause them to act out our limiting beliefs. How many times have you said to yourself, “I knew he/she would leave.” or “I knew it was too good to be true?” Statements like these are evidence of a toxic belief system.

You will see your belief system play out over and over in your life until you clear it. Pain exists to point you toward the truth. Clear the pain and you can experience bliss. Our path is to remerge with spirit and to do so we must transmute the dark energy back to the light. As Bruce Lipton calls it, “Spontaneous Evolution.” It is the path we are all on. You can make it as hard or easy as you like.